Is it Possible to “Find” Balance?

The Beauty of Balance

Have you ever been on an airplane before? Do you recall the canned speech the flight attendants always give? You know the drill, so you probably just tuned them out. Did you realize there was a hidden gem packed inside their simple message? They explain that in the event of a change in cabin pressure, an oxygen mask will drop down from the compartment above your head. You are told to secure your own mask before you help anyone else with theirs. The logic behind this simple instruction is that we can’t help anyone if we pass out due to lack of oxygen. In other words, we can’t help others if we do not first help ourselves.

Does this extend to your personal and professional life as well? Sure, it does. Each day you get out of bed, exercise, shower, eat, get the kids dressed, play with and feed them, drop the kids off at school, head to work, pick the kids up at night, make them dinner, give them a bath, play with them, get them ready for bed, spend alone time with your spouse, do chores, do something for yourself like read a good book, and go to bed. Oh, you mean you don’t exercise and you don’t do anything for yourself and you don’t spend alone time with your wife talking about the state of the union and you don’t play with your kids? What happened?

You ran out of time? Nope, you were misled by pundits who told you to “find” balance. You can look all day and all night to find balance but you will never find it. Instead, you have to create balance with the decisions you make each day. You need to prioritize your “rocks” as Dr. Stephen R. Covey said. If the top priorities are health, abundant time with family (including time alone with your spouse), and the passionate pursuit of your interests; then why are you spending so little time in these areas? Has the urgent strangled the important?

People often speak of spending “quality” time with their family as if they can force it. This is another myth that needs to be put to bed. Quality time is the side effect of quantity time. You never know when these special moments will happen, but the more time you put it the more opportunity exists. Sometimes we make the excuse that we cannot afford to take a family vacation. The real question is, how can you afford not to? Without experiences and memories, we have nothing.

You will only be effective at helping others when you become effective at helping yourself. Sometimes we have to do things in our business that don’t make us money but provide us with enjoyment. It is difficult to give your best when you are miserable all of the time! This is the paradox of “selfish” selflessness. You have to put yourself first in order to be the best you can be for everyone else.

Image Credit: Brent and MariLynn